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teen trouble

I love my teenagers. And all the teenagers that come and go at my house.

A lot of people don’t feel that way about teens, I know.

It’s hard when they do all the teenager things we don’t think they should be doing.

Really hard.

But the only thing that gets in the way of love (and loving teenagers) is fear.
Fear is always what keeps us from love.

Do you feel afraid that your teen is going to make huge mistakes?
Do you worry that you haven’t done enough to protect them?
Or that you’re not doing enough now?

This fear and worry drives us to tighten the reigns too tight and listen to every fearful thought our brain is offering us.

The truth is, they will make mistakes.

You can’t really protect them from life.

And maybe you can always do more… but perhaps you’re not supposed to.

Let’s love our kids when they lie and when they break the rules and when they get in big trouble.

Let’s love ourselves by offering ourselves grace (after all we are trying to figure this out).

Walk that line between rules and freedom and do it all with love. Love is more powerful than any of us realize.

Have an amazing Friday – you deserve it.

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I miss my kids

My kids are spending time with their dad for 6 weeks and I really miss them.

When I have them all the time, I wish I could have a break.

I want them with me.
And I want a break.

And the grass… always seems greener on the other side of the fence.

Can you relate?

What is this phenomenon we experience of always thinking things will be better if they are different than they are now?

Even though I feel it sometimes, I know it’s not really true.

What if today you can enjoy exactly what’s in front of you for what it is?

What if feeling better or happier or more successful isn’t out there?

What if it’s inside of you? What if it’s available in this very moment?

Hug your kids if they are with you.

Enjoy the silence if they aren’t.
Enjoy your independence.

Laugh about that not-so-great date.

Wherever you are – breathe it in, rather than wish it away.

Sending you love and wishes for a beautiful weekend- you deserve it!

Understanding

Do you ever wish someone understood how you were feeling?

I know that feeling…

Lately I’ve been feeling like an anomaly.

Like my experience and challenges and hurts are so different from everyone else. I find myself trying to find someone who understands.

I know you’ve felt that way too.

Maybe for you your marriage was hard, and you were relieved to have it end.

Maybe your marriage was amazing, and you felt heartbroken and betrayed when it was over.

Maybe you feel like a failure.

Maybe you feel judged.

Maybe you feel hopeless or alone.

Maybe you feel a lot of things and you seem to be so different from everyone else.

Can you relate?

This is always the time that I remind myself of one of my core beliefs – God understands. At the deepest level, he knows exactly what I’m feeling. He cares that I feel that way.

God knows you.

He understands how you feel.

Even if no one else does – he gets it.

Have a beautiful weekend – you deserve it.

fragile

My client was feeling really fragile yesterday.

She didn’t like that she felt that way.

She was thinking her life was a bit of a mess.

And she didn’t like that either.

Feeling fragile or having your life seem like “a mess,” isn’t a problem.

It’s only a problem when we make it mean that we aren’t strong or capable of handling our life.

Personally, I feel fragile pretty often.

And my life… often looks really messy.

I have to remind myself that it’s okay for me to be human and to feel and be exactly the way I am.

What about you? Can you relate to feeling this way?

If so, I wonder if you can allow yourself to be human today and not make it mean anything about how strong you are.

I wonder if you can totally drop the ball on a lot of things, and still have a handle on a lot of things that are important.

I wonder if today you can see the good and accept the “messy” parts of your life as perfect the way they are.

Think about it.

Have a beautiful weekend- you deserve it!

Is there anyone out there?

My client Sue wonders if she will ever really find someone to be her partner.

She had a great marriage for years. It was happy and connected. She loved her life.

Why did it have to change? How will she find that same happiness now?

Will she always be alone?

These are the things she wonders.

You may wonder these things too.

I know what it’s like to wonder if your life can really be what you want it to be. I know what it’s like to have a drastic change in your life and feel extreme loss and sadness. I know the feeling of lonely. And I know that lonely is hard.

I also know that life has shown me time and again (for me and my clients) that life is happening exactly as it’s supposed to.

I know that the worst things ironically turn out to be the best things.

I know that if you decide you want happiness in your life – you can and will create it.

I’m excited for you and all that your future holds.

It’s going to be magical. Don’t you think?

Have an amazing day – one thought at a time!