,

shame

It’s your *Friday Love Note* and shame

I met an amazing single mama this week. When she found out that I was a coach for single moms, she was so excited! Then I mentioned that I focus on helping women through divorce and her demeanor changed – I could see her shrink into herself a little bit as she told me she was never married.

I imagine she thought I would have a negative judgment about that.

I recognized the shift in her demeanor and the shame that came up, because I see it in my clients all the time for a million different reasons. (I’ve seen it in myself too.)

My clients feel shame that…

They got pregnant before getting married.
Their husband cheated on them, which means they weren’t enough.
Their husband left them.
They left their husband.
They are the only one in their family who is divorced.
They think they’ve failed their kids.

So many reasons they feel shame, and yet, none of them need to be reasons to feel shame at all.

Shame is a lie always and forever. Shame tells you that you’re bad and there is something wrong with you. Shame tells you to hide. Shame will shut down the best parts of you and it’s totally unnecessary.

The list above, is just a list of evidences that we are all human. We are living a human experience, in an imperfect world, as imperfect people, relating to other imperfect people.

I love that single mom I met. I love you reading this. And I love myself too. Not because of what we did or didn’t do, but because we are humans worth loving.

Shame is a lie. Don’t believe it.

You are of infinite worth.

Have an amazing weekend – you deserve it!

-Molly Claire

are you capable?

*Friday Love Note* and are you capable?

A few weeks ago in my membership group for single moms we talked about feeling incapable of handling everything in our lives. Melanie sometimes feels overwhelmed and thinks she can’t handle all that she is responsible for. Finances, mom duty, and doing everything on her own. It seems to be too much.

I told her that I totally disagreed with her. I can see that she is more than capable – she just can’t see it herself.

I asked her if she thought I was capable of handling my life and she said yes. She sees me from the outside handling my life. She sees me smiling and she assumes I’m doing just fine.

While it’s true that I am capable and handling it – that doesn’t mean that I always feel capable.

Sometimes we all feel inadequate. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed. Sometimes we feel so much doubt and wonder if we can really do it all.

But we don’t need to believe any of those feelings.

You are capable of doing it, even when it doesn’t feel that way. You are 100% qualified to handle your life. You are the one perfectly prepared to parent your kids. You are totally ready to navigate everything going on in your life.

You’ve got this. Trust me. It’s true.

Have an amazing weekend – you deserve it!

Click here to join my membership! We do a whole lot of awesome in there!

Xo
Molly Claire

do you read these?

It’s *Think it Thursday* and do you read these blogs?

I hope you do.

Last week a woman emailed me asking about coaching. She told me that she gets more out of these short weekly blogs than she does her therapy appointments.

I was so happy to hear it! Not because of me.

(After all, I’m just the vessel for these messages.)

I was happy because she is taking the time to read them and think about how it pertains to her. She’s allowing them to make a difference in her life. The email is the same for all of the thousands of people who receive it – but she is allowing it in.

Do you allow them in? Do you open yourself up to growth and change?

I hope so. You’re amazing. You deserve good things in your life.

Have a great day, one thought at a time!

– Molly Claire

metamorphosis

Friday Love Note and metamorphosis

It’s impossible to go through a divorce and not become a very different person on the other side of it.

I remember how afraid I was going into the divorce process. I think of myself back then going into that dark cocoon, so afraid of what might happen. I was afraid of how things would turn out and if I would make it through.

Can you relate?

The exciting news is that when you finally come out of that cocoon – you can see the metamorphosis that’s occurred. You remember who you were, and you see how far you’ve come. You’re so different than you were.

You’re stronger. Wiser. More yourself than you’ve ever been before.

It’s a total transformation.

The cocoon is temporary. I can’t wait to see what happens for you on the other side of it.

Have an amazing weekend – you deserve it!

dating

This week in my single mom membership group we talked about dating.

So fun, right? 
Or scary. Or fascinating.  Or however you want to look at it.

It can be crazy to think about dating again after a decade or two of marriage.  I know it was for me.

We talked yesterday about the most important first step in starting a new relationship…

Which is the relationship you have with yourself.
The relationship you have with yourself is how you treat yourself and how you talk to yourself.
It’s what you think about you and how you have your own back (or not).

If I’m kind to myself, then I’ll expect a partner to treat me the same way.
If I like who I am, then I’ll believe I’m worth being with someone who is amazing to me.

Cultivating a good relationship with yourself and practicing positive self-talk is the best first step in finding a great match for you.
Take some time to evaluate today how you treat yourself.

What things do you say to yourself on a regular basis?
Do you like those things, or do you want to say something different to yourself? 

Be your own best friend.
Look for the good in yourself.
Encourage yourself.

I promise that when you do this, you’ll invite others into your life who will treat you the same way.

Oh, and if you want to claim a complimentary trial spot in my membership group Click Here and use coupon code “Yes2You.”  You can join us for next week’s call online.

Have an amazing weekend – you deserve it.
xo
-Molly Claire