Single Mom and Christmas Alone

It’s Christmas morning and I just had a picture of my little girl come through on my phone.  She’s in Christmas PJs that I didn’t get for her.  Her eyes are lit up with excitement, from gifts I didn’t put under the tree.

You know what it’s like.  And you never imagined this would be your experience of Christmas.

I’m writing to you this morning because I’m thinking about you.  I’ve spent the last several weeks focusing on being intentional with my thoughts around Christmas and what I’m choosing to create with my kids.  It would have been so easy for me to stay stuck in a pity party, but if there’s one thing I’ve realized it’s that a pity party is the worst party ever.

A pity party, is a party of one.

You’re the only one there.

And anyone who drops by, wants to leave immediately.

You do terrible things at the party like obsess over everything that’s wrong.  You serve regret and hopelessness for refreshments.

The party, is not a party at all.

And I don’t recommend it.

If you’re feeling sad today – it’s totally normal – and I’m feeling some of it too.

The waves will come and go, and that’s okay.

But know this also – you don’t have take up residence in that state of sadness.

I know it’s hard when the negative emotions are so strong.

I know it’s hard to believe that they will ever go away.

I know it seems that they are defining your life, and that they’ll define your future.

But that is never true.

Here is my message to you:

The emotions will come and go, and you can handle all of them.

They don’t need to overtake you or your life.

And they don’t have to mean anything about what’s possible for you.

Today, whatever you’re feeling – allow it to be okay without making it mean that you “are” that emotion.

It’s the difference between, “I’m feeling sadness” and giving in to “I am sad.”

It’s acknowledging, “I’m feeling some hopelessness,” instead of “I have no hope.”

Or choosing, “I’m feeling some fear about my future,” rather than “I’m afraid of my future.”

It’s a small shift, but an important one.

You are going to be okay, I promise you that. 

There is so much hope and healing available.

If there’s one day in the year we know that to be true – it’s today.

Merry Christmas Mama.  You’ve got this.

Your future is amazing and so are you.

Sending so much love.


-Molly Claire