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escape

Lately I’ve been wanting to escape being a mom.

Like literally thinking about fleeing the country and never looking back.

It seems like such a selfish and shameful thought. A thought I didn’t want to say out loud, but I did it anyway. And when I said it out loud I felt so much relief.

The only reason I feel this way – is because I care so much about them. And I want to do a good job. I create pressure. I don’t believe I’m measuring up. And… I want to flee the country.

Sometimes my clients feel this way too… and they feel guilty about it.

They think they shouldn’t want to escape. They think they should be a better mom.

They have a book of rules about what being a good mom and a good person looks like, and there is no room for being human or having thoughts that don’t seem “good” and “positive.”

I think the rule book is wrong.

Being an amazing mom includes having all kinds of thoughts and feelings.

Loving your kids means feeling negative emotions too.

And being the perfect mom for your kids, means being you with all of your humanness – the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s all part of the deal and it’s exactly as it should be.

Be amazing today. Have compassion when you’re feeling burned out. Trust that you’re doing better than you think. And please take an extra break for me, will you?

Have an amazing day – one thought at a time!

Reducing Stress… Advice from my five-year-old

reducing stress

We hear a lot about reducing stress, but did you know that worry and stress are optional?

I always like to opt out.

Except when I allow them to creep in.  Which, I do.  More often than I’d like.
But, the truth is – they are just not useful.  Just take it from my five-year-old.

Yesterday our dog was shaking on the way to the vet.
When my five-year-old asked why, I explained to her that she was scared.

My daughter was baffled, “So… she’s shaking???  That doesn’t do any good at all!”
(yes, she’s 5)
She went on, “You know, it’s like worry.  Worrying doesn’t help anything at all.  It just makes you feel worse.”

That pretty much sums it up, right?

So why do we worry?  Why do we allow stress to come up over and over again?

Well, because that’s our default. It’s our pattern.
It seems useful or necessary.
And it doesn’t really feel optional.

Shaking didn’t help our dog.  Worry and stress won’t help us.

What’s happening will happen, whether we worry about it or not.

So when it comes to reducing stress and worry, what do we do?  How do we opt out?
Here is your Quick Tip:

Stay in the present moment. 

When we worry we are skipping ahead to the future.  We allow our brain to go in a million directions and think about everything that is wrong (or could go wrong).
It happens so fast that it’s like a super highway of thoughts…creating worry.

You can slow it down by pulling yourself back into the present moment.  Slow down your thoughts.  Think about what’s right in front of you.

This simple practice will change your world.  I was fortunate to hear from Thomas Sterner last weekend, author of The Practicing Mind, and this is his specialty.  Staying in the present moment preserves our energy and helps us to be the most effective.  I am obsessed with this concept, so don’t be surprised if it comes up a time or two 🙂

So, that’s it.  Take a deep breath.  Notice what and who is right in front of you.  Ask yourself to focus on the present moment. Tell yourself you’ve got this.  And see what changes…

Oh, BTW – I’m bursting with inspiration and insight from my conference last week!  If you’d like to schedule a mini-session to get a little “nugget” of wisdom or help with reducing stress, just Click Here and we’ll chat.

Have a great day, one thought at a time!
Thanks for joining me for Think It Thursday!  Inspiration, Quick Tips and <3 from me to you!