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money

Yesterday on the podcast I talked about money.

Money fears.

Money beliefs.

Self-beliefs… related to money.

I remember when I was going through my divorce and my master coach training at the same time. My own beliefs about money were revealed to me and I didn’t like what I found. In fact, I became determined to believe something different…

At the time I was terrified at what would happen in my financial life. I had met with an attorney and her news about Texas law seemed bleak. I felt afraid that I wouldn’t be able to support my kids. I worried that I would be reliving my mom’s life as a single mom who was overworked and could barely put food on the table. I grew up watching her worry and fear every single day about money.

Once a month she would sit at her desk in this little nook at the top of our narrow staircase. We lived in a tiny duplex and I would sit right next to her while she worked – just grateful that she was home with us for once. She would write a tithing check first and put it on the corner of the desk and then work on paying the rest of the bills. There was never enough to cover them and she would always say, “we’re in the hole again” which was never a surprise to us.

Fear. Worry. Watching my mom bear it all, was a lot to handle.

And here I was, wondering if I was about to be in the same predicament.

I came to my master coach training call and was getting coaching from my peers and mentor/teacher, Brooke Castillo. Brooke asked me, “Why can’t you make as much money as your husband does?”

My answer, made me sick to my stomach as soon as it came out of my mouth. “Because I’m a woman.”

Yes. I said it. And I knew I believed it.

How could I think that? I didn’t want to own that thought.

And I decided that I didn’t want to believe that was true.

I knew that plenty of other women made a lot of money, so it had to be possible. And I knew that I wanted to believe I was capable too.

I didn’t adopt this new belief overnight, but I became relentless in my pursuit of believing that I could believe this at some point. I kept pushing the limit of what I believed was possible. I knew that even though I didn’t believe entirely today, I would believe a little more than yesterday.

What do you believe about your ability to make money?

Are you happy with that belief?

If not, are you willing to decide to believe something different?

What you believe is what you will create. Believe something awesome, okay?

You’re amazing.

Have a beautiful weekend- you deserve it.

escape

Lately I’ve been wanting to escape being a mom.

Like literally thinking about fleeing the country and never looking back.

It seems like such a selfish and shameful thought. A thought I didn’t want to say out loud, but I did it anyway. And when I said it out loud I felt so much relief.

The only reason I feel this way – is because I care so much about them. And I want to do a good job. I create pressure. I don’t believe I’m measuring up. And… I want to flee the country.

Sometimes my clients feel this way too… and they feel guilty about it.

They think they shouldn’t want to escape. They think they should be a better mom.

They have a book of rules about what being a good mom and a good person looks like, and there is no room for being human or having thoughts that don’t seem “good” and “positive.”

I think the rule book is wrong.

Being an amazing mom includes having all kinds of thoughts and feelings.

Loving your kids means feeling negative emotions too.

And being the perfect mom for your kids, means being you with all of your humanness – the good, the bad and the ugly. It’s all part of the deal and it’s exactly as it should be.

Be amazing today. Have compassion when you’re feeling burned out. Trust that you’re doing better than you think. And please take an extra break for me, will you?

Have an amazing day – one thought at a time!

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Are you powerful? (p.s. read this blog all the way to the end)

I think you’re powerful.

And what I think, might actually matter.

Someone once told me in a low moment that I was, “powerful and vibrant.”

I didn’t think I was at the time, but I decided to believe him.

I decided to think that he saw something in me that I couldn’t see.

I wondered if it was true.

And if it was true – what might be possible?

I decided to believe it and I moved forward with determination. 

(I tell more about this story on the podcast here – it’s a good one)

With that belief, I built my business. I wrote a book. I helped my kids through the divorce process. I trained hundreds of life coaches over the space of a couple of years. I rebuilt my life one day, one emotional breakdown, and one triumph at a time.

Not because of what or who I was… but because of what I believed. 

What do you believe?…
What if you are powerful?
Vibrant? Capable? Brilliant? Determined?
What’s possible then?

Decide it’s true.

Allow that belief to move you forward to create exactly the life you want.  I know you can.

**HEY! I’ve got something for you!  

There’s a (free) 5 Day Reclaim Your Life Challenge for Single Moms coming up… ARE YOU IN?

Click here to find out more and join the challenge. 

Have a beautiful weekend – you deserve it!

-Molly

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Holiday Emotions

This week on the podcast I talked about the strong emotions we feel over the holidays.

Sadness, anxiety, jealousy, worry… just to name a few.

My client Janet is avoiding holiday parties because it’s her first Christmas after divorce. It seems too painful to go, when she anticipates such strong emotions are sure to come up.

The only thing Janet is avoiding – is an emotion.

Think about that.

An emotion. A feeling in her body. A strong feeling… that is really scary to her.

But in truth – she can handle any emotion that comes her way.

We go to great lengths to avoid feelings because we think we can’t handle them. But we always can.

What emotion are you avoiding? What if you can allow that feeling? What if you can cry sometimes without shoving it down? What if you no longer have to fear the way you’ll feel?

What would you do then?…

Think about it.

Click to learn more about How to Handle your Emotions like a Boss on the podcast.

Have a beautiful weekend and an amazing Christmas– you deserve it!

-Molly Claire

Holiday Jealousy

Christina worries that her kids have more fun with their dad and his new girlfriend over the holidays than they do with her.

It’s really hard for her.

It’s so hard for her that she begins to overextend herself and overspend her budget… to try to win them over.

When they are with their dad, she feels terrible.

She wishes she didn’t feel so jealous, resentful, and inadequate.

The reason she feels that way is that she is making the good relationship with their dad, mean something about their relationship with her.

She thinks if one relationship is amazing, the other one can’t be.

It’s as if there is a relationship budget – only so much happiness and connection to go around.

The truth is that the relationship they have with him, has nothing to do with the relationship they have with her.

They can love him, and they can love her. They can have fun with his girlfriend, and it means absolutely nothing about how her kids feel about her.

And the same is true for you…

If you want to hear more about this topic – CLICK HERE to sign up for my free webinar on Holiday Success for Single Moms. I address 3 main issues that single moms face over the holidays (and how to solve them). It’s totally worth carving out 30 minutes to join me. I’ll even answer your questions live.

Can’t wait to see you then!

Until then, have a beautiful weekend – you deserve it!

-Molly Claire